im a skeptic, i always have been. that is until i fell in love. doesnt mean i those mushy-gooey-i-believe-love-makes-the-world-a-better-place kind of person, because i am not. dont think i will ever be. the point i want to make is, i try and learn to accept that this person, is there to make me feel whole, to make me feel better about myself, to always be there for me.

it is not easy being in a relationship, there is no fairytale, and definitely no derek shephard. but as skeptic as i am, i am also a romantic, once in a while, i liked to be romanced. once in a while, i like to be treated like a princess. not that i am not now, but it’s scary to think, “what if this all ends one day when i wake up?” or for that matter, when he wakes up?

the “what-if”s in a relationship is what scares me. i think i have abandonment issues, and that is why i am afraid of commitment. but once i made that commitment, please promise you will stay, even if the future is uncertain. i see more break-ups than happily-ever-after, and i want to believe we are one of those happily-ever-after people. even if we both do not believe in happily ever after, but we could be those happily-ever-whatever people.

it’s not going to be easy, but it’s going to be worth it. im not going to be easy, but we are going to be worth it. i dont need big promises of a ever after, or that we’ll get married and have kids, i just need to know that whatever it is, whether i pushed you away or im being difficult, i just need to know, you will always be there.